Why so serious?

I am a 25 year old laid back average professional who is waiting for a miracle to happen in life and become rich. Like every other person of my age I want to own a huge house, a luxury car and want to buy whatever new in the store. And my plan for being rich is simple, every night I make a wish "in the morning I will open my eyes and see a bag full of money waiting for me to spend it", for the last 15 years I am loyal to my plan. I believe in God and the miracles he can do, he can do super crazy stuffs like giving sight to a blind dude, this is nothing for him. I look at people who runs after their goals, work hard towards it and think "how lame, can't they be more like me?". I mean imagine if everyone is as cool as me, life would be easier, no more struggles only araaam. Awesome right?

This was me till yesterday, today my bestie who is a mean loud mouth told me that God has stopped granting vain wishes, how could he? She said he is more modern and has become more like our ex-boss, if you perform you get the perks otherwise you get kicked out. Damn, what to do? Realization struck me is now struggling, what shall I do, shall I go ahead and ask my parents whether they have any idea about the current trends, nah they are from the lost era. My friends, man they are as lost as me. May be my professional network can help, yeah probably they are too busy figuring out their life. Oh I got it, when in doubt google, they have all the answers.

I took refuge in Google, after hours and days of searching in the internet, I have become an expert career advisor who can be as diplomatic and manipulative as any great politician/google itself. Oh don't forget that I still don't know how to become rich, all I know is that if I have an idea there are thousands of sites and people who can make me a billionaire (saala idea hi toh ni h). There are few sites who claim that I can be a billionaire overnight and my horoscope says I have got the ability to turn the world upside down, hell how come my parents never mentioned it. Are they scared of me becoming another twilight kid/Harry Potter, man I am living with jealous mortals.

Na, na, don't worry, got it all figured, I just have to come up with a ground breaking idea ( I will hire someone to think on my behalf) and start my business, voila I am rich. See you in Hawaii baby, signing out.